Hello, and welcome back to my little corner of the interweb!
Today I just want to chat about life. Hopefully someone can relate to this, and maybe I can help or perhaps you can help me!
I’ve been feeling incredibly overwhelmed this past week, more so than normal. I think it’s directly related to last weekend being insanely busy at work but I also think that my fears, thoughts, and aspirations have been teaming up on me. Basically I worked 19 hours between Saturday and Sunday and had no time for anything at all. When I finally got home I was exhausted and worn out. I’m currently a server at a restaurant, so my job is not only physical but emotional as well. If you’re a server, have been a server, or know someone who is then you probably understand what I’m talking about. It can take a lot out of you and last weekend it definitely did.
I felt like I didn’t have any time to myself to just relax and by the time I got home from work I had no energy to do the things I wanted to do. My back was killing me and my feet were really sore and it made it very hard to do anything except lay on the couch once I got home. However, by just crashing on the couch, I made myself more anxious and overwhelmed because I felt guilty about it. I was home from a long day at work, yet I was watching other people on social platforms live their lives the way I wanted to live mine; and I was doing nothing to move towards my goals.
I have started to realize over the last few months that I am the only one who can make a change in my life. I mean I have always known that nothing would change drastically unless I did it, but thinking about it and dreaming about it didn’t count as action. It’s a scary thing, to take your life into your own hands. I have always lived in other people’s shadows, scared to do something different, afraid of what people would think. Afraid to fail. I still am. In spite of that, I am doing it. I am trying. I am writing this post to attest to this. I keep believing that every one of my posts needs to have a fancy, well edited featured image and photos to keep everyone reading. It probably would help. Yet, I am letting the fear of not having those things all the time, get in the way of just posting. I can’t move forward if I don’t do it, right? I know things will come in time I just need more experience and time to learn.
I want everything I do and write, to be an accurate portrayal of who I am as a person. I want it to be raw, and real. 100 %.
So if you’re going through similar feelings of being overwhelmed by everything you want from life, I am here for you and would love to chat. I hope I was able to encourage someone to just jump in, regardless of what it is that you want, or your skill level in it. Just grab hold and go, if you think about it any longer you won’t do it. I have waited 5 years to start aiming for my goals. Don’t be like me. You’ve got this!